September 19, 2005
Week 21 - The Quest 1
Episode 1
"Entrail Lad" Hal exchanges instant messages with "Packed Heat" Mark.
Entrail Lad: Man, that was awesome! Did you see how Ricky blew that guy's head off, by the lava pit?
Packed Heat: I was too busy guarding the flag. Never take your eyes off the flag, dude! You're a player, not a f--king spectator.
Entrail Lad: You think I can't play and watch at the same time!
Packed Heat: Not if you don't want a rocket up your ass!
Entrail Lad: How my gonna know what the other team's doing if I don't watch them?
Packed Heat: You just watch your man and your flag. Tune out everything else, like some f--king zen master! That's how you stay in the zone.
Entrail Lad: The Death Zone!
Packed Heat: F--k right! Hey, listen man! Forget all that. I got news! Big news!
Entrail Lad: The operation was a success! You're a girl now?
Packed Heat: That's right honey! And I want you! Shithead! No listen… Before we played… I went to the Ego Software website. To see if they released the 6.702 patch.
Entrail Lad: Is it there?
Packed Heat: No but listen! It doesn't matter! We don't need no crapass patches for Death Zone 2 no more.
Entrail Lad: What are you talking about? The 6.702 patch is supposed to cut network lag by like 20% or something.
Packed Heat: Dude, it doesn't matter! Death Zone 2 is history! On the Ego website, they said it!
Entrail Lad: Ohmigod! You're f--king with me!
Packed Heat: No man it's true! They've been keeping it secret. Didn't want to say anything till it was done.
Entrail Lad: Jesus when?
Packed Heat: Next week, on Monday! They're finally releasing Death Zone 3!